Awards Ceremony! | Silmaril Awards 2021

So. The villains who weren’t shortlisted have been politely asked to leave, the edge of a curtain and also an odd circular patch in the lawn have been set on fire, several villain-to-villain farewells have been topped with a promise of eternal friendship (by which I mean "my good friend, your flair for villainy is commendable, if you ever need an ally in a plan I’d be touched if you thought of me, I love murder"), and a portal has been opened up in my bathtub because aPPARENTLY the front door wasn’t dramatic enough to leave by.

I’m just happy I didn’t need to call the dragons to drive them out.

So this leaves us, of course, at the final round of the award:

 

Most Nefarious Villain: Awards Ceremony

Presented, of course, by Saruman, noted Istari from Middle Earth!

Excuse me for a moment while I just blibbityblobbitybloop myself into a third person side character.

*crackling static*

Voting Opens! | Silmaril Awards 2021

So it's one week in, and my house is full of villains. Which I suppose I did sign up for, literally, I put my name in the box an' all, but there are?? One hundred and two of them? Actually it might be a hundred and three, it's difficult to keep track, there are a couple of them currently speedwalking laps of the kitchen table while giving out-of-breath evil monologues and I'm not sure which of them is chasing who.

And among that one hundred and two, there have been some definite reader favourites!

Unfortunately, even among those favourites, not everyone can go in the running for a Silmaril Award. We have to be very picky. After all, there is but one Nefarious Villain Silmaril, and – I believe I might have mentioned already – there are a hundred and two villains. 

Which is why only the top five – as nominated by your good selves, and tallied up by my own numb fingers! – will make it to the voting round. 

So let's have a moment here to applaud all the lovely nominees. Very nefarious, folks, very nefarious. I've heard some quite elegant monologues (and some terrible ones, but I'm not naming names, because I am rather fond of my ears being attached). Three plates and a floral teapot have fallen, as poor innocent bystanders (again, I'm not naming names here, but to save myself from the wounded honour of the English villains I will specify that it was not any of them. Or any of the other tea-drinkers. Of which there seems to be an unreasonably high percentage among the villains, and if they haven't been spotted drinking tea they always give me the impression of being tea-drinkers, so I have some questions here. Namely, does evil naturally gravitate to tea, or does too much tea make one evil.)

I think someone ate my petunias. I'm afraid to ask who.

Nominations Open! | Silmaril Awards 2021

(So. Let me just. Take a moment for the jitters.)

(Stress? who, me? there is absolutely no reason that I would be nervous, wha-ha-hat– Did you hear an explosion outside or was that just my imagination? I'm in sudden fear for the lives of my petunias–) 

 

Anyway, it's my pleasure and stress to announce to you all, shouting into the depths of the blogosphere like the slightly hoarse and crazy-eyed gremlin I am:

 

Beloved friends and tolerated acquaintances, it's time
for the 2021 Silmaril Awards!

And not only! am I! hosting?? a category! but also!

It's the villains.

Nominations For the Most Nefarious Villain!

 

How to nominate your favourite bundle of death:

• Jump in the comments of this post and yell their name! Usually it's "I nominate Captain Hook! his mustache is the epitome of nefariousness in villains!" or something like that, but if you feel like hiring a herald or something to jazz your nomination up a bit, go for it. It's what your villain would want.