Australian Culture (Mostly the Food)

Sometimes I discover something about another country, or the way someone else lives, and it shocks me because I never even thought about the fact that someone could live differently in that regard.

For example, not everyone eats Vegemite. And while I may have been able to accept that, apparently there are countries in which shops don't even sell Vegemite?? My uncle lives in an Asian country, and my grandmother has to ship him big jars of it. The downside of international travel/living.

Recently, someone told me that in Europe, people don't eat pumpkin. I don't know how true this is, but I can't even imagine. No roast pumpkin? No pumpkin scones? Pumpkin fruit cake? Pumpkin is such a common vegetable in my life, the idea that some people don't even consider eating it made me think more about differences in culture.

And I think I'm rambling here, because I was thinking of another post and then decided to go with food and I'm writing posts at 11pm again and why do I do this to myself.

BASICALLY. AUSTRALIAN FOOD TODAY. Because I know a lot of the blogosphere is based in the U.S.A. And I thought I might introduce you to a new culture.

...I know. It isn't as though I don't speak English. (And only English, sadly.) How different could the culture be??

...and that is what I'm arguing against today. Just because Australia is an English-speaking country doesn't mean it can't have a culture different to other English-speaking countries.

And so. many. people. don't know what they're missing. Because we have some good stuff here, mate. Today: the food.

Beware: I'm a Writer || or: meet my family!

Everyone knows writers are dangerous people to be around, right? We have the whole "if you annoy me I'll put you in my book and kill you" thing.

Which I have never done. Yet.

But people-watching is a great way to get new characters. Or figure out how your characters would realistically act. Or get hilarious dialogue. Which is what I'm here for today.

Sometimes I overhear things I reeeally want to use in my writing. And, since I don't leave the house that often, most of these things are overheard from my family.

If you're reading this, my dear family... I'm sorry. But you're living with a writer.

things my family have said (that I want to put in a book one day)

Sister 2: Are you asleep?

Me: ...yes.

Brother 2: "Canada's crashing the holiday bus!"
[I refuse to give you any context.]

Sister: Why is there water in my spot? *stabs it with her fork*

Me: ...why are you wearing sunglasses?
Brother 1: these are not sunglasses
Brother 1: these are night vision glasses
Brother 1: they make it look like it's night

Brother 2: I see two stars in a line!

Brother 2: (singing) You make me wanna shout
                  Kick my heels up and shout
                  Throw my arms up and shout
                  *trails off* ...and catch them?
Me: ...How?
Brother 2: ...with my hands. I kept those.

Sister 1: Do I have conversation in my eyes??

Mum: New rule. No Batman at the dinner table.
Sister 1: *hands still spread over her face in a 'mask'* *raspy voice* But... I'm Batman.
Mum: No.
Sister 1: ...
Sister 1: *dives under table*
Sister 1: *comes back out, rather disheveled* Batman had to go.
[We'd just seen the trailer for The Lego Batman Movie. Just. the. trailer.]

Mum: What are you doing on the roof?

General sibling group: ...what?

Mum: What are you doing on the roof?

Sister 1: You get too attached to things that are too easily broken.
Brother 2: *clutches his Lego creations protectively*
Brother 2: You used to cry too when it was pack-up time.

Brother 1: Can I borrow your camera? I'll try not to fill it up.

Me: With photos of bugs?

Brother 1: *walking away* *completely seriously* No, dragons. 

Brother 2: *into disconnected radio* Got a coffee, mate, got a coffee?
Me: ...
[I don't know how universal it may or may not be, but Aussie truckies open UHF conversations with "Got a copy, mate?"]

Sister 1: My genius is ruined on you.

Me: I think you mean wasted?

Any sibling: There's a bug in my dinner!!
Dad: It's fine. He won't eat much.
[On the other hand, if it's a caterpillar, the answer is "He only tastes like the cabbage, that's all he's ever eaten..."]

Sister 1: She thinks she's the bee's bonnets.

Sister 1: *drinking*
Me: *comes into kitchen*
Sister 1: *drops cup of water* *slaps her hands across her face in her 'mask'*
               *raspy voice* ...What do you want?
Me: ...
Me: Don't forget to clean that up.
Sister 1: ...but I'm Batman.

_____

Sister 1 is the drama queen of the family (and the possibility of her reading this post is... higher than I'd like.) Do you have siblings, and do they sometimes say downright hilarious things? Or are you the hilarious one in your family? What's the funniest dialogue you've overheard? (doesn't have to be from your family!) Is this standard Dad behaviour, and do you have any message for Sister 1?? (I suggest stop being such a drama queen, kid, but I suppose I'm biased?)

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